So, What Do You Do?

“I tell my students, 'When you get these jobs that you have been so brilliantly trained for, just remember that your real job is that if you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else. This is not just a grab-bag candy game." - Toni Morrison

Classes are about to begin for many students. It feels pretty good to be among them. So many things are falling into place, this feels undeniably right. Why then, is that nagging voice still in my head trying to plant seeds of criticism and doubt? Though I love to know people, becoming acquainted is awkward at best. I hate admitting it is still torturously painful describing 'what I do'..."um, I'm a part-time medical biller, but I want to write, no, I haven't written anything, I don't really know what I want to write but....." Really, how many of us can successfully convey what we do through small talk? We act as if our job defines the purpose of our lives, but it really is just a means to an end. That end, for most of us, is to make a difference. To love and be loved. The things we do everyday to make a difference cannot POSSIBLY be summed up with a description of our vocation. I'm proud to be a mother, a wife, sister, and daughter. I'm proud to be an aunt and a friend. I try to keep up with the people I care about, filling their needs to the very best of my ability. I try to learn something every day. I try to make my environment a better place. I am special in the way that I do these things, but not in the activity itself. We all do them. The energy and love we put into every moment of our day is what defines us individually and makes our planet golden. So can we please come up with more accurate labels for what we do? "I am a humanitarian, student, teacher, musician, mom, gardener, writer, lover, singer, fighter, chef, maid, home maker, accountant, peace keeper, athlete, poet, and child of God. You?"

A Shameless Plug

I am so in love. You know, the kind that makes you want to burst, and you take every chance you get to talk about it, 100% certain that your love is so colossal, it will change the world.  I'm so in love; with my church. I became acquainted with Renaissance Unity about ten years ago when I had the unbelievable opportunity to hear Maya Angelou and Wayne Dyer speak, (sacred experiences, both). Two years ago, we really started getting close. I may have mentioned in previous posts, the minister is phenomenal. Rev. Jim Lee delivers his weekly messages with sublime compassion and delightful humor, an engaging fusion of a Dalai Lama and Chris Rock. He is the lungs of the church, breathing loving energy and Truth into the entire community.  The heart of the church is the incredible music provided by RU's choir, The Gospel Truth accompanied by a diverse and faithful band. (Incidentally, I realize there is a lot that goes on behind the scenes, but I assert that the band may be the single most under-rated component of the church service.) The backbone of the church is the congregation. If ever you are feeling alone or unloved, please walk through the doors of Renaissance Unity on a Sunday morning. You will be greeted with genuine warmth and a smile at every turn. I could go on and on, but I really want to get to what happened yesterday. As happens most weeks, there were several sacred junctures: I was overcome with gratitude when the praise dancers, six beautiful women of various ages and ethnicities, offered themselves through exquisite interpretive movement and unreserved expression. Then, an impromptu version of "Jesus Take My Hand", sung by Juliette, whose voice rivals Aretha's, brought everyone to their feet and reaching for tissue. And then there was the moment that went beyond sacred to transformational. Rev. Lee confessed that he had a realization that he himself had been holding back. That revelation sparked a palpable change in energy and renewed faith. He evoked the memory of his Mother so strongly that she was undeniably present. His invitation to walk boldly forward with the hand of Jesus inspired me to action. He has been a spiritual voice leading me to action on my own behalf, and now, I want to be an advocate for the church. I ask you to consider visiting Renaissance Unity, a non-denominational, Christian-based, spiritual community of faith that is open to all. It is well worth the forty minutes it takes me to drive there, but you can also see the service online on Sunday mornings. Renaissance Unity has much to offer, and will undoubtedly welcome the gifts you will bring to it. See for yourself at www.RenaissanceUnity.org.

Feelings, Nothing More Than Feelings

"We fear violence less than our own feelings. Personal, private, solitary pain is more terrifying than what anyone else can inflict." -Jim Morrison

I so fiercely desire to be good, -and I want just as much to be liked. I'm beginning to think these are conflicting goals. If they are not in direct contrast to one another, they are definitely blocking what should be my goal, and our common goal as children of God: authentic happiness. The inner peace of mind, body, and soul that comes from living in Truth and connecting with the Christ within. I spend so much time condemning my feelings, those that I am so loathe to speak, only I can deem them nasty or petty. I am just beginning to see the irony there. Instead of fixating on my negative feelings, berating myself for them, and trying to will them away, I can simply acknowledge them and move on. It seems simple enough, yet I know I have quite a bit of work to do. It is such a foreign concept that I can barely wrap my head around it. As it always is when putting faith in something new, my heart knows it is right. So I will pursue the practice of being okay with how I feel, because I am good. And my feelings are just that. Just feelings, and they can't change reality. That's one more lesson in learning to love myself. As a final note, thanks to my sister for nudging me along and loving me enough to get me through times when it's hard to love myself. 

For Sale: Oceanfront Property in Arizona

“I design, manufacture, distribute, and sell elevator buttons. I specialize in the fourth floor. And I don’t mean to brag, but I’m such a good salesman that I could sell one of my fourth-floor elevator buttons to the owner of a three-story building. I’m also into jazz. I make elevator music in my free time. My motto in life: You can’t push my buttons if you don’t buy them.”  -Jarod Kintz

When I mentioned last week that I was turned off by the idea of becoming a salesperson, I may have jumped the gun. Yes, salespeople are widely acknowledged as shysters and connivers, using underhanded manipulation to trick us out of our money. Further, I was of the opinion that their most offensive crime is operating from an over-inflated sense of self-value. True, salespeople must be liked and trusted, they must be admired and revered. Their confidence level must be a ten. Upon further review, I see the contradiction. I know better. There can be no "inflated" sense of self-value. We are worth more than we can even imagine. We all, on some level, could do nothing but benefit from possessing the confidence of a great salesperson. Get behind the gifts you have to offer, be passionate about the product that is 'you', your bottom line will be tremendous spiritual, personal, and professional profit.
p.s. I did it. I enrolled in a course to become a certified life coach. I am sooo excited!!! By the New Year, I will have a new professional path that feels bursting with possibilities.