Like I Know What I'm Doing

"Always kiss your children goodnight, even if they're already asleep." -H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

My babies are almost grown. In the eyes of society and most laws, they are responsible for themselves and the choices they make. At times, I have felt that it was all happening too fast, but there were certainly days when I longed for less responsibility and more time for myself. I am looking more and more forward to my empty nest, and I will be one of those parents who pesters my kids for grandchildren. I know I will always worry about my kids, and hope they make good choices so they can live happy lives. There are some things I would definitely do differently, like, establish a routine, and keep the television on PBS. (I would have also forced them to get up on water skis. -16 years living on the lake, and none of them would ever try it....shameful!) Mostly though, I am beyond proud. They are amazing, kind, smart and funny. So here's my advice, humbly offered to new parents:

• Try not to worry so much. All that angst brings out the worst in us, and sends the wrong message, "always be afraid to try", and "mistakes are a bad thing."
• Go ahead and tell them "no". It's perfectly ok if they aren't happy with your decision, even if they are mad at you. They will learn they can overcome lack, and better yet, they'll learn how to make themselves happy.
• Every age and every stage comes with its own unique set of challenges. Parenting is hard. It won't get easier, but -it's all good. This is where faith comes in, God's got this!
• Just love them. As trite as that sounds, it will get you through your darkest moments. Your children will be foolish, oblivious, and cruel. When they figure out that you love them unconditionally, they will start to listen, and your voice will be with them even when you are not.
• Give in once in a while. They will learn it's ok to admit you were wrong and do the same for you.

By no means am I the perfect parent. I do enjoy my kids, and I attribute that to being present and enjoying the moments as they come. And an occasional adult beverage.